Have you ever experienced a chock? It might have been something you experienced yourself, or something you saw someone else experience. Mirror neurons allow us to feel what others feel.
Did you have a painful separation? Maybe you were abandoned by a parent, a dear friend, someone died, or you lost your spouse and/or the love of your life?
Have you been attacked? Did you have an accident? Or did you go through a painful operation?
Maybe you once almost drowned?
Were you bullied or rejected by others?
What is a Sabotaging Pattern?
The list above can be made long. So many things can leave a mark and we might not always be aware that it does.
So how do you know there is something to heal?
You might notice a sabotaging pattern. The pattern of how you react to stressful situations. Something triggers you, and you respond by fleeing, attacking, freezing or fawning - fawning means being overly accommodative, polite, nice, and thereby losing your own identity and boundaries. It is as if you cannot control your reaction. You wish you could respond differently. Intellectually, you understand that the reaction is exaggerated in the current context. However, you keep on responding in the same way. That is a sabotaging pattern. For example, someone has consistent problems with authority figures, like managers at work, teachers, etc. This could be linked to having grown up with an authoritarian and/or violent father (or mother), or sibling. It could also be linked to the early loss of a parent, and the anger and grief of having to grow up without the support of that parent. This anger is then projected towards persons of authority.
How Does Wingwave® Coaching Work?
One of my favourite tools to help clients is called Wingwave®. This method contains an "all in one box" aspect that I love: Eye movements, NLP and Myostatik testing:
Bilateral Hemisphere Stimulation – Gently enforced REM (Rapid Eye Movement) naturally stimulating auditory, kinaesthetic and visual through a series of back and forth movements.
Neuro-Linguistic Coaching – Use of questioning techniques, statements and “buzz words” to enhance sensory experience and navigation.
The myostatik test is used by the coach for precise navigation into the exact point of stress triggers and blocks. The thumb and finger are gently squeezed together and the coach is able to investigate the effect that certain words and statements have on the body. The accuracy of the muscle test has been tested and proved effective by a series of research projects in Universities.
Emotions are “energy in motion” and should naturally move through us. But they can sometimes get stuck when we feel overwhelmed, stressed or try to suppress them. Have you ever been in a situation at work where you have felt so stressed and upset but you’ve had to hide it? Your mind will push the stressful experience to the back for processing later as you continue to get on with your day. But you feel hurt, rejected, angry, embarrassed etc. Under normal circumstances these emotions fade and you “get over them”. But if the “negative” emotions do not fade due to sleep disruption or because the stressful event has not been subconsciously processed during REM sleep, you remain“stuck” in this past conflict which can lead to a secondary problem in the form of anxiety, panic, negative thinking.
Sabotaging patterns of behaviour are caused when a person tries to subconsciously move away from pain and into pleasure. This can be related to subconscious fears or habitual and addictive behaviour. An example would be when a person uses a prop such as alcohol, food, smoking and drugs to try to suppress their pain. However the pleasure or numbness does not last and the emotions get stuck.
During moments of intense stress, both brain hemispheres no longer cooperate in an optimal way. The emotions get “stuck.” When a stressful event is experienced it is normally processed during our sleep as the subconscious mind works to file it all away, however this does not always happen. During the REM phase (Rapid Eye Movements) our eyes move horizontally very quickly, and our stressful and traumatic experiences are processed. Hence it is the perfect self-healing procedure for emotional upheaval i.e “Sleep on it!”. However, the increasing level of stress many people are exposed to every day keeps them from processing stressful events during their sleep. Restless sleep and sleeping pills can completely impede the important REM phase which leads to a constant pattern of negative thinking. If emotions that are associated with certain events in the past are not properly processed, the situation is like a CD that has a scratch: the processing gets stuck in the nervous system at a certain point.
A wingwave® intervention simulates an REM phase while the client is awake. The client’s eyes follow the coach’s fingers waving in front of his/her face and the “stuck” emotions begin to be processed at a rapid rate. The eye movements allow the brain hemispheres to work together in a coordinated way and the previously “stuck” emotions start to “move” again. During the waving process the client may experience some intense feelings, but they are perfectly endurable and do not last longer than a minute. The mental block that was caused by extreme stress disappears.
As the intervention completely re-activates the formerly blocked mental capacities, it enables the brain to find its own creative solutions, making use of its already existing resources. The client can gain some surprising wisdom and flashes of insight during the intervention. The effects of Wingwave® coaching can be reinforced, if necessary, with the methods of NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming).
“Wing” in the word wingwave® comes from the wing beat of a butterfly. According to chaos theory, this tiny force has the power to change the weather, if the beat occurs at exactly the right time and place. In a similar way, in order for your coaching session to make changes possible, we will select an exact starting point for your wingwave® coaching based on your current physical and emotional needs by applying a muscle response test (“O-ring test”). The wing metaphor also depicts how the brain hemispheres work together to support intellectual flights and to secure successful landings. “Wave” conjures up the term “brainwave” as in “brilliant idea” or “flash of inspiration”. And exactly these kinds of brainwaves are triggered by targeted wingwave coaching.
The Butterfly Effect – The scientific theory that a single occurrence, no matter how small, can change the course of the universe forever. That even the flutter of a butterfly’s wings can cause a hurricane on the other side of the world. If you change even the smallest of life’s details, you completely change its outcome.
Wingwave® is an effective, yet gentle coaching method which works by dissolving emotional stress and subconscious blocks for uplifting results in just a few (1-3) sessions. Created by two German Psychologists Cora Besser-Siegmund and Harry Siegmund, wingwave coaching has over 20 years scientifically proven research which continues to take place at both the University of Hamburg and University of Cologne. Wingwave® is a big success internationally, particularly in Germany, Switzerland, Spain and Mexico. There are collectively around 8000 Coaches practicing across the world.
Wingwave® combines several extremely effective and well-proven coaching techniques to achieve immediate, profound and long-lasting changes. This innovative method is the preferred technique for addressing all areas of life that are connected with stressful memories and stuck emotions regarding past and future events that impact on your sense of well-being and accomplishment.
How Wingwave® helped Me
I decided to learn this method because I wanted to help my children (and clients) to overcome various traumatic events. I also realised that I was traumatised myself, having partly seen what they went through, and being so emotionally close to them. For example, one of my children survived a terror attack when she was 15. Another child suffered several serious allergy attacks, so called anaphylactic chocks. I was present during some of these chocks and it was horrible. My child could have died. I will write more about that in another blog category about the NAET method.
During the course (in Germany) to learn Wingwave®, we treated each other. I was fascinated by the rapid resolution of the problems. Prior to the treatment, I was asked if I could feel the sensation of the chock in my body. It felt like ice in my veins. A minute after, it was all gone and has never returned. I went from a -10 (panic) to 0 (neutral) in a few minutes. I was amazed. When I came back home, my children could feel the shift. One of my children exclaimed "your energy is totally different now!". This is what I love about it. It is quick, efficient and really helps you overcome even very painful experiences.